hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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