I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize