if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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