I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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