Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
