I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
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