you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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