i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
