My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
