everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams