bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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