Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
