Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up

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(618): View more from Illinois

id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(819): View more from Quebec

She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad

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(501): View more from Arkansas

I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.

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(858): View more from California

Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.

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(585): View more from New York

I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was

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