do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
