heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize
