Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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