The maid of honor just puked.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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