I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
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