ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
