your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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