I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
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On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
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btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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