she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
