he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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