I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Randomize
