You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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