Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize