ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
