Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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