I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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