Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
