Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Come on in and take your pants off
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