you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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