You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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