some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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