I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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