yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Randomize
