This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
