There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize