Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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