doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
