found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
