I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize