You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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