I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
