Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Randomize
