So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
