I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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