so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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