watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
