We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
