Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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